Separation Anxiety and Me

Well it finally happened. The day when Jarell had to leave for Oregon finally came and he left about an hour ago. My almost SIL was here to see J7 off so we were together temporarily in our shared pain. Are we big sissies who just can’t deal with the men in our lives leaving for ports unknown? No not really. I know we’ve got it better than military spouses who send their loved ones into danger and hang in there any way, but we don’t have to enjoy being separated from our mates either. Jarell is not just my husband, he is truly my best friend as well. And I get lonely without my friend here by my side. Fortunately its a busy time of year for me what with the upcoming holidays and all and I have a colonial style dress to make and embellish so I should be able to keep busy, but the nights are long and lonely and my friendships are mostly long distance. Joni in Texas, Nessa in NorCal, Cassie in Iowa, and all of you in your respective home towns. J11 has been distant towards me of late and I don’t what I did to offend. Richie, my almost SIL has invited me to join her for the last day of the Ren Fest and we’ll hang out a bit because we get along well and share many similar interests, but she has her own friends near her home and her home is a good 40 minute drive from here.

Last year I filled the void left by Jarell’s being out of town with work and shopping. Shopping is good, verdad? But this year there is less money and gas, altho down to $2.71 is still rather expensive for regular jaunts in a gas guzzler like our GMC. I live in the middle of nowhere and civilization is a 20 mile drive at best. Thats about 8 bucks just to get there and back without buying anything. So I’m going to hole up here for the most part and make a couple of well thought out trips into town for some special goodies once Jarell gets his first check. Its a union job so it will pay well and he’ll probably be able to take the whole winter off work so that makes up for it a bit. I should be thankful that he has such a well paying job that is guaranteed in these uncertain times- people have to have wells and mine ventilation shafts and pumps for those wells. It may not seem feasible to city folks, but for those of us living in BFE, these things are necessities. (well maybe not the ventilation shafts, but the well stuff) So I won’t complain that we’re getting the money. But I do object to him being gone. I could have gone with him, but we have 5 dogs and not everyone is as devoted to making sure they get fed every day. Once a week is enough for some people…. so I just can’t run off and leave like that. I’m jealous tho- I want to be on the West Coast. With him of course, but he’s so close to the ocean and my other home. Sorry today is a sad day for me. Hormones that go with that time of the month don’t help matters any. I’ll be better soon. I’ve got a dress to make and a house to “haunt.”

You may hear less from me because with his being gone, I want to keep the phone lines open in case he calls…. In case something happens… I’m thankful he’s not flying, but the closer to instant gratification of knowing he’s there safe is lost when he drives.

Also there will be no pictures till he returns because he has the camera.

So I’m going to be boring and mopey AND pictureless! *grins* I’ll understand if you give me up for lost and boring.

A bientot


2 thoughts on “Separation Anxiety and Me

  1. Both of my husbands (one and two) were firefighters and gone every other day for 24 hours. In my young life, I literally sat and mourned over his being gone and again, literally counted the hours til he would be home again. I lived deep in the country and had no where to go and no money to spend if I went.

    Conversely, husband number one was GONE, laughing, enjoying, (yes, and fighting fires) but he enjoyed that too.

    Men have no comprehension of the stupidity we put ourselves through over them.

    By the time husband number two came along, I cherished my alone time and STILL didn’t go anywhere, even though I had the money to spend by that time.

    With age, comes wisdom dear.

    And as for people feeding their dogs weekly? Were you serious? Damn the cruelty of humans. MANY cruel people (mostly men) will kick a dog because he’s whining for food, while the man has the refrigerator door open, picking out his fifth meal of the day. grrrrrrrrr

  2. Not serious about people feeding their dogs weekly, serious about them not remembering to feed MY dogs more than weekly if I were to go out of town. Because they don’t have pets themselves and therefore just don’t think about it. Yeah….

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